Dear Dog – 4

Hello, my friend… I’m so very sorry that it’s been so long since I last wrote to you. I had been thinking, recently, about writing you another letter and when I looked back at the last post to you, well, I just couldn’t believe that it had been since April. Boy oh boy, does time ever fly when you’re not thinking about it.

Been meaning to ask you about your human’s wedding and how things are going now with “the fluff”? Have things improved? Or have they gotten worse? I can only hope that there has been an improvement. I can’t even begin to imagine how it must be with that little ‘twerp’ running around the house, bothering you.

Was the wedding nice? I do hope so, as I’ve often thought of getting married in June, but I am still too young to even contemplate that at this time. And besides, I’m not really sure that I’d like to get married, now that I’ve had some experiences with the “boy from next door, George”.

Mum always opens the kitchen window for me during the summer months so that I can get out and enjoy some fresh air and sunshine. She even purchased some fake grass to put down outside the window so that I don’t have to lie in the dust. (I wasn’t quite sure about it at first. It really tickled my toes and I didn’t like the feeling, but after a while, I decided to just start walking on the stuff and eventually I got used to it. As a matter of fact, Mum popped her head out the window one night and caught me laying on the grass, so now I’ve been busted and there’s absolutely NO EXCUSE to not go out there.)

At any rate, the boy next door had taken to visiting my little patio at night but got a bit lippy and I didn’t like what he was saying so we started fighting. Thank goodness that there is a fence around my patio and George couldn’t get in, because I’m sure I would have torn him limb from limb, had I been able to get my paws on him. Now, every time he’s come over and we get to fighting, there’s a lot of noise going on and Mum has been able to fly to the window (didn’t know humans could fly) and she finally got George good one night, and me too. She has a spray bottle that she used to use on me when I was trying to sharpen my nails on her favorite chair, but after she got me a proper scratch pad, I don’t bother with the chair anymore and Mum is very pleased about that.

So anyway, this one particular night, we’re fighting, and she’s flying, and she just happened to have that spray bottle in her hand. Scared the crap out of both of us when she popped her head out the window, then her arm came out and attached to the end of it was that bottle. She let loose on George and soaked him good before he could make his escape, then she turned to me, smiled and soaked me too. Said I needed to learn a lesson about fighting and to try to be nice to others. So now I REALLY hate George, because Mum’s gotten both of us a couple more times since that night and I can’t fight with him anymore, without expecting a soaking. So George has now taken himself off and hasn’t been heard of since, but it’s only a matter of time before he returns. (He even tried digging under the fence to get on to my patio but my Auntie Pat got him good and had some cement laid down in that hole and now he can’t dig there anymore, haha.)

On a happier note, I celebrated my third birthday on November 2nd. Nothing really exciting. In fact, I didn’t even get a birthday present, but Mum has assured me that there is something coming, she’s just not sure when it will arrive. I’ll let you know what I get if you’re interested when I write next time.

Until then, enjoy life, and have fun messin’ with “the fluff’.

All my best,
Your friend, Luna

One thought on “Dear Dog – 4

  1. dog says:

    dear kitty,

    many apologies for not typing back, but my person went on his honey moon. that’s a special trip that newly married couples take. so they left me and fluff with aunt beth, his sister. more about that in a moment. anyway, she doesn’t have a computer, only one of those tablet thingies that i can never make work for me. my person must have taken his computer with because when he got back, he was complaining that the travel people had lost his luggage, and his computer wasn’t around anymore. i would have used his new wife’s computer – i guess she’s my person now too? – but i didn’t know her password.

    yet. the fluff helped with that. more about that shortly.

    the wedding was really quite pretty, and i even got to take part. they had me be the ring bear. maybe they forgot i’m a dog, or maybe they were pretending, but however that worked, i got to carry the rings, sewed onto a little pillow i carried in my mouth. fluff was the flower girl, and they tied a basket of flowers on her back. she wasn’t quite as focused as me and wandered off between the pews until aunt beth went and got her, and then guided her up the aisle. i just sat there like the good boy i am, at the front of the church. i didn’t account for my slobber though. can’t help it, the pillow felt funny in my mouth. so by time fluff got to the front of the church, the pillow was really wet. the rings must have been too, because my person had to ask for a towel to dry them and his hands off.

    by the way, why do they call church benches pews, anyway? they don’t have much of a smell.

    anyway, the wedding was really nice. then there was a reception, and for once i didn’t have to stay outside. fluff and i mooched so much cake and ice cream off the guests, i couldn’t run for days.

    so, while we were at my aunt beth’s, fluff was still being a bit annyoing at first, hoping to get aunt beth to take her side of things, but lucky for me, aunt beth ALWAYS believes me. fluff finally got caught burying the brand new soup bone aunt beth had given me, and she got in a whole lotta trouble for that. so she started pouting and all the other usual dramatics.

    that lasted for about two days. then, on the third day, fluff was outside when a big mean CAT came into the yard and started chasing her. maybe this cat is related to that george fellow, because he was hissing and spitting and swiping and all that. fluff was scared yapless, and she just kept running and whining.

    i figured, fluff may be an annoying ball of lint, but with the wedding and all, she was now MY annoying ball of lint. i charged outside, barking and snarling, and charged the cat. well, he took one look at me and COMPLETELY FREAKED OUT. his fur puffed, and he made a vertical launch from the middle of the yard right over the fence.

    i didn’t know cats could do that. you kitties really are amazing.

    anyway, fluff was so grateful to me for saving her from the big scary cat that she decided once and for all we were friends. i agreed to that, especially since being friends with the fluff was so much less work than finding opportunities to sit on her. she said i was ‘totally alpha’ when i scared that cat away.

    anyway, that brings me back to when my…our…people got back from the honey moon. i was beside myself because i had no way to write to you, and it had been ever so long. i didn’t tell fluff why i was so mad because, we may be friends now, but i don’t totally trust her. anyway, she must have figured it out, because on christmas eve, she told me she had a present for me, and then she whispered her person’s laptop password in my ear.

    i felt really bad about not getting her anything, until i realized that fluff had NEVER EVER SEEN ‘send in the dogs,’ so when the people went on a new years eve date all night, fluff and i binge watched the whole series.

    she says hi, by the way. i read her most of your blog, except for your suggestions about what to do to her back when she was being annoying, and she’s decided that some cats are ok. she also suggests finding a larger creature to bark at george if he comes back. i don’t know if your mum can do that, but its worth suggesting. water bottle sounds like it works though. fluff said her person used to use that on her when she was a puppy. even now she hates water.

    happy new year, kitty! thanks for being my friend

    -dog

    p.s. i looked it up. i was the RING BEARER, not the ring bear. i started to feel silly until fluff said that she thought she was supposed to give flowers to everyone there, and that’s why she wandered around in the pews.

    p.p.s. fluff is also much less of a twerp because i started sharing my big dog food. she likes it better than small dog kibble. food really is the way to a dog’s heart.

    Liked by 1 person

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